Every advert during a certain few hours essentially screams MAKE SOME FAST MONEY SO YOU CAN AVOID WORK FOR LONGER! The people behind these schemes know their audience. Aside from the retired, the genuinely sick and the souls who work dodgy shifts, no-one watches Jeremy Kyle, This Morning or Loose Women – it’s a circus of shit being ring-led by a top hat-wearing ASBO.
Advertisers are well aware of the folk who tune into daytime TV and have turned into devilish little goblins, happily leading the masses down a trail called Easy Money. If there’s one thing their followers are keen for it’s money they don’t have to earn. Money they can spend on extra Lambrini. Money they merely need to apply for, although it’s a wonder that some of them can spell their own names.
The Cash4Gold opportunity burst onto the scene a few years ago but has slowly and surely bled dry due to dwindling sources of Argos jewellery, whereas the PPI avenue will undoubtedly reach a dead end soon because loans and credit cards aren’t really given to people of this, erm, calibre. But it’s little wonder that the ‘where there’s blame there’s a claim’ adverts are proving to be consistently successful; anyone can have an accident in a supermarket and sue the retailers. It’s easy to slip on a wet spot because you were too busy gawping at high shelves for the offers on White Ace, and it’s even simpler to trip over a kick stool when you’re enthralled in the latest statuses pinging on your Mobile Facebook.
Some people would happily throw tins of beans at their kids in a bid to get£5,000 off Sainsbury’s, others would genuinely be unfortunate enough to choose the one section of a bench that immediately falls through on arse contact. The former are where the problem lies. Instead of choosing to work, there are people who will do anything to try a quick scam in the hopes of making a quick buck. And the companies that promote the idea of placing blame onto big companies, councils and small businesses are sickening.
Why not tell these ‘accident’-prone people to be more careful? It’s no-one else’s fault they tripped/slipped/sliced themselves in whichever way. Instead of claiming money for being clumsy, they should have to face the embarrassment of a bearded man telling them off because, chances are, they weren’t paying attention where they should’ve been. Warning signs are ignored, dangers are challenged and when something goes wrong the idiot gets rewarded. Why? Why is it like this?
There should be a new line of adverts. If you’ve not been faux-clumsy, ridiculous or moronic in public over the past decade, and you’re a decent, contributing member of society, you’ll get £10,000. Perhaps it’ll encourage people to behave like well-functioning humans and promote the idea that to get rewards you have to put in graft and not be an imbecile.
It’s a small idea, but it’s about time that the decent people got recognition and bonuses.
